I write like…

As your resident party pooper, I say that the “I write like” website probably isn’t totally legitimate or accurate. If it’s telling me I write like Dan Brown and James Joyce and Gertrude Stein, I want to know why. There may not be any rhyme or reason to these famous author matches, but it’s still fun to see who’s writing your words emulate. I entered three snippets of writing into the generator: 1) a blog post 2) a poem and 3) an essay.

Round ONE

Round TWO


Which famous author do you write like? Go for it.

Just Finished Reading

Woke up at 6:30 a.m. to finish Catching Fire. Now I’m running late to work. I enjoyed it more than the first one, but honestly, I think that’s because I already knew what was going to happen in the first book from watching the movie. A book spoiled just can’t compete with a fresh read, especially with books like the Hunger Games series, which are so dependent on the plot line for substance and enjoyment. I do give Suzanne Collins credit for keeping me up at night and propelling me to rise earlier than I usually would. But would I read Catching Fire again? Probably not.

Now, The English Patient, on the other hand, which I read earlier this summer, will seemingly always be able to sink its poetic language, characters and insights deep into my consciousness, leaving new tracks each time. I call it one of those books that you feel compelled to read again and again and again…because it’s just so gosh darn beautiful and GOOD.

Lollapalooza (Recapped)

Tried and True Survival Skills:
1. Bring your own toilet paper
2. Do not accept watered down alcoholic beverages from strangers
4. Wipe yourself down with baby wipes for a quick hobo shower (you and those standing around you will thank you for this)

One highlight: Doomtree…Bangarang!

One regret: Choosing Santigold over Frank Ocean

One disappointment: The Weeknd

One surprise: Calvin Harris

Tried and True Fashion Suggestions:
1. Shorts (or skorts or jorts)
2. Backpack (be wary of back-sweat)
3. Stunna shades and other accessories
4. Bring a second pair of shoes in case it gets muddy
5. Sweat rag (to wipe away the oh so attractive glisten)

Kind-of-Meant-for-Me-Moment: Childish Gambino… “Asian girls everywhere…UCLA”

Most fun to watch: Oberhofer! Brad is just a big ball of sunshine and music (and hair).

And let’s not forget how the skies turned green and reigned over our sadness for 2 and 1/2 hours…

Skinny Gurls are Giving Back to World Hunger One Skipped Meal at a Time

I found this blog called Skinny Gossip last night that repulsed me to the core. According to Skinny Gurl, the misguided person behind this controversial site, “the idea was to create a gossip site with a snarky counter-view to a culture that glorifies excess consumption.” By “excess consumption,” Skinny Gurl is referring to girls who maintain a healthy diet and have normal, natural curves. Apparently, Skinny Gurls should only be bones and skin. No meat, no thickness, no volume allowed ANYWHERE. Anything more than skin is “excess.” Need an example of what Skinny Gurl considers the average fat-ass? See below:

Commenters on the site are no better. In a post about Lindsay Lohan’s Playboy shots emulating Marilyn Monroe, “Bryony” writes:

Oh NO! LORD FORBID. Lindsay Lohan weighs 120 LBS at 5’2″…WHAT A “VILE” HUMAN BEING! I think I just vom’ed in my mouth.

The even sicker thing is that devoted followers of Skinny Gossip laud and encourage each other to consume an exorbitantly meager amount of calories to get even skinnier. As I was browsing the forum section of the site, one girl was concerned that she looked fat even when she was getting through her days with negative net caloric intake (burning off more than she was taking in). If that’s not anorexia, body dysmorphic disorder, or some sort of mental illness then I don’t know what is.

Self-proclaimed skinny gurls or skinny gurl wannabes advise each other on starvation tips and how to avoid eating at social gatherings.

Skinny gurls must fit into size 0 jeans. Size 00 is better. Triple zero? Even better. The ideal situation would be to disappear completely.

Skinny gurls must look like prepubescent boys. Big butts and big boobs are for fat girls, which means Kim Kardashian is atrocious. How is she even able to stay afloat in a bikini with that anchor dangling behind her?

Skinny gurls must do whatever is necessary to maintain their figure. Smoke cigarettes, endure hunger, look at pictures of Kim Kardashian’s behind so they will feel sick and “not want to eat the rest of the week”, lock themselves in their closets, etc. Putting food into their bodies is just like throwing away good food in the trash. In other words, skinny gurls are garbage cans. Seen in a different light, they are food conservers. They eat only what is “necessary.” The world should champion them for their humanitarian efforts. In fact, if everyone ate just like skinny gurls then hunger problems would be globally irrelevant, because everyone would look like famished African orphans by choice. It’s all about self-control, people.

Here are some more examples of people who skinny gurls believe are “hurt” by food (see quote above for clarification):

“We get to see her belly sticking out, her thighs touching and her fat hanging out over her shorts – gross!”

“I think she would look much better if she lost about 15 lbs, then she would gain skinny status.”

“You would think she would know that eating cupcakes makes you fat – but I guess she just isn’t that smart. Now I know where she got her mommy arms and big fat thighs.”

No one is spared. Not even Victoria’s Secret models…

“…personally, I can’t get past her thighs and belly.”

What belly?! What thighs?!

So what do skinny gurls consider “skinny” then?


and this…

and this…

What upsets me the most is seeing how our generation has completely distorted the connection between the human body and food. Food has become the enemy instead of a fuel source. Food is bad. Food tempts us. Food is not enjoyed. Food elicits guilt. Food is out to get us, to make us fat, to lower our self-esteem, to make it impossible to be “skinny” and “happy.” Food is the monster, and we have become the victims.

I have no overarching advice. There will always be days when we feel fat, and there will be days when we feel thin. There will be tubs of ice cream we wish we hadn’t eaten, just like there will be buckets of tears we wish we hadn’t cried. There will be mornings when we stand before a mirror scrutinizing the surface area of the body like a crime scene. There will be nights when we realize our bodies are mason jars filled with light. There will be hands that pinch and probe us until we are bruised and purple as corpses. There will also be hands that roam our bodies trying to learn the architecture of what they have set out to love. Let the first hands to find the answer be your own.

22 ways to get your Hepburn on

I just finished reading How to Hepburn by Karen Karbo, and I must say, I quite enjoyed it. It was altogether a completely different sort of inspirational biography. Perhaps what Karen Karbo does best is show us how Katharine Hepburn‘s staunch (and often incomprehensible) adherence to her peculiarities, her work, and her married lover has granted her immortality in American film history. What I have learned to truly admire and respect about Hepburn is that she not only knew what she wanted, but she knew herself best of all. And she refused to compromise any part of herself for anyone else even in the face of criticism and hostility. For example, Hepburn loved pants even when society thought she was a mad woman for never taking off her trousers. But through her love of pants, Hepburn revolutionized the meaning of being a woman, and that is more than any of those skirt-wearing cinema sweethearts, the ones who have long since faded into history, can ever say about their fashion dogmas.

In the last chapter of How to Hepburn, Karen provides us with a list of 22 ways to get our Hepburn on.  These 22 are some of the best advice that I’ve ever come across, because they dare us to live happily, honestly, audaciously and, most importantly, unapologetically. Because we should never have to say sorry for being the most fabulous person on this planet.

  1. Have a Credo
  2. Find Yourself Fascinating
  3. Find a Sport(s)
  4. Say What You Think
  5. Don’t Confuse Self-Improvement with Self-Remodeling
  6. Realize You Can Go Forward Blindly
  7. Assume the Answer is No, Unless You Can Find a Reason to Say Yes
  8. Be Frugal
  9. Strive to Fully Inhabit Your Life
  10. Prefer Dark Chocolate
  11. Develop a Concept of Fun That Includes Not Just Play, but Work
  12. Find Danger Exhilarating
  13. Master the Headstand, and Keep the Skill Sharp as Long as Possible
  14. Wear Sunscreen
  15. I Cannot Emphasize This Enough, WEAR SUNSCREEN
  16. Find the Type of Clothes You Feel Best In and Never Take Them Off
  17. Cold Baths, Pros and Cons
  18. Surprise the World and Yourself by Enjoying a Good Cry
  19. Waste Time
  20. Never Pass Up the Opportunity to Give Someone a Good Sock in the Jaw
  21. Care for Someone Who Doesn’t Deserve It
  22. Make It Count